Musings of a Floater Driver

Trying to bounce back...

2011-07-21T18:48:00.000-07:00

Well...
Lots of changes have happened, and I'm trying to get back in the swing of things. One thing is certain - I miss trying to write stuff. How to spell, punctuation, just getting thoughts out of my head and turned into words seems difficult all of a sudden.
*Grin* I still want to say all of the sudden, but a teacher eons ago told me that was wrong. *Grin* Sometimes I think that was wrong, but I digress.
Still dreaming about my trip to Bricktown. For a business trip, it was incredible. It's nice to see I still enjoy things sometimes.

Getting Stronger

2010-03-04T18:16:00.000-08:00

I'm a serious fan of the last 'Rocky' movie - 'Rocky Balboa'. If I was paying attention, the movie was written by Stallone himself, and if that's true... He's a wise man.

I'm a particular fan of his speech to his son, and later, himself. Something to the degree of 'Life isn't about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. It's about how much you can take, and keep moving forward.'

We're moving into gear at work - spring isn't far away. I'll admit, I might have hoped it would never come, but I'm getting a little more confident about our chances every day. To steal another movie line, "I think it all depends on a lot of things we don't know yet." Without worrying about surviving every spring, I know life would be easier, but I wonder if an easier job makes for a more fulfilling one?

Anywho...

I was out of town last weekend, and I'm going to be out of town next weekend, so I'm definitely looking forward to spending some quiet time at home. I'm itching to get back to work on my stories. *Grin* Yes, I did say stories. Plenty of ideas - now I just need to get down to business.

Review

2010-02-18T03:26:00.000-08:00

Employee review time comes around annually at work. I always take the process seriously, but this year, it sparked a more personal evaluation of myself than the company ever intended. I don't feel like that's a bad thing - but I do, for the firrst time, feel like the process has followed itself through, and is truly complete.

I see what changes I need to make in my actions and attitude, and implementation is nothing more than an act of willpower. In other words - I'm back.

It has been nice to live the past month or so and pretty much do as I please with my time. Don't get me wrong, I still try to do my chores and meet my obligations, but I've also built models, watched too much T.V. and surfed the internet too long. Perhaps it has been a working vacation - but it has felt a bit like being on holiday.

Speaking of which, I'm off to La Crosse, Wisconsin for several days next week to attend an Organic Farming Conference. I know it sounds a bit odd for a chemical applicator, but there are several reasons for deciding to attend. *Grin* I have to admit, I'm even a tiny bit nervous about what I'll find, which is odd, but it's a new frontier for me both professionally and personally. It should be an interesting time.

Home? I want to say something about home. For a visit, for whatever... I find myself wanting to be there for a while. Can't say as that's always been the case.

Peace and Love,

Eric

Chillin' like a Hundred Dollar Bill

2009-12-20T06:27:00.000-08:00

I'm not getting a lot done this weekend, but I have to admit I'm having fun doing it. My wife is off seeing family - I'll join her Tuesday - but for now I'm on my own. I have to admit, I had hoped to make progress on my writing, but it seems model truck building is the order of the day, at least for now. Both are hobbies, but one represents a hope for future productivity while the other is all about R & R. Building models has been my way to step away from myself for a long time.

Stangely enough, it's easier for me to talk about this than it is my writing, but I started an exercise routine Thursday. My tummy might be a bit bigger than I'd prefer, but all in all I've always felt like I could hold my own with most in my industry. Nonetheless, my doctor told me to bulk up a bit if I hoped to survive into the future, so... It has begun.

I enjoyed the previous season of 'The Biggest Loser' on TV. Particularly in the early episodes. the contestants showed so much heart - both for themselves and each other - it was really enjoyable to watch. It was more than watching fat people sweat - it was watching them all turn around to go back for the slowest guy and help him up the hill. So, when it came time for some conditioning of my own, I turned to Gillian and Bob (Or, more accurately DVDs of them) since I'd seen and more or less approved of their methods while watching the show. *Grin* All I can say is it's easier to keep up with them from the couch than the floor.

Even I know I'm dancing on the edge of nurning out, as far as my career goes. It was a hard year - longer than anything I've faced in quite a while. A lot of factors combined to make it the year it was, many of which were beyond my control. That doesn't make it any easier to want to go through it again. That being said, we're just getting into patching up the battle damage to get ready for next season. One thing I have learned with all confidence...

If you slide out the door to avoid a good fight - you're always the guy who slid out under the door to avoid a good fight. Next year will be a grand war.

I'm off to meet up with the wife Tuesday - and likely won't be near the computer. Allow me to send all of my hopes to you now for a very Merry Christmas.

Peace and Love,

Eric

Wow

2009-12-13T07:18:00.000-08:00

Harvest season turned out to be an adventure. It seems like everything does for me - but I really hadn't seen this one coming. I mean, how hard can it be to dump a few trucks and push the occasional button on a grain dryer? The better question is, how naieve can I be???

I kept thinking in my head, "This isn't my fight - I'm an agronomy guy." The truth is, the cooperative system is full of issues, but in its ideal form, it teaches the employee base that everyone does everything, and no one is better than anyone else. I don't know... Enough nights spent next to the grain dryer doing the job I probably would have attributed to someone else made me believe this premise isn't so bad. Now, if the rest of the world would take a minute and think about it, we might be somewhere.

My personal interests took a real beating during all of this. Obviously, it's hard to keep relations with my wife at the level they should be while for all intents and purposes being gone for a month. I believe I'd just met Jean Valjean in my reading of Hugo's Les Miserables, although I hadn't gotten far enough for him to be named by name. My personal writing pursuits? Well... I actually made just a bit of headway, beginning the layout for a story that has been in my head for some time.

I'm a little the worse for wear physically. I saw the doctor just before the beginning of season for my shoulders (left, in particular, but both in general), and was offered some anti-inflammatories and the advice that I should bulk up a bit. The pills dont' help much, so... I'll have to do what I can for the other A.S.A.P.. But all of my bodyparts are still firmly attached, so... I'd like to think there are always possibilities.

I'm starting the off-season by entering a diecast truck-building competition. No prize, except for bragging rights and sticking my nose back into a community I've enjoyed from time to time. I'll never win, but... I enjoy the experience.

The Kid

2009-11-08T16:43:00.000-08:00

It's kind of a coincidence Disney's 'The Kid' is on TV today, not long after I opened the printed copy of my annual Christmas Story.

You know, in a life full of hopes and expectations that never meet with reality, it sometimes seems like nothing can be more bothersome than a hope or expectation that doesn't see reality. It seems like it digs a little more when the expectation is a simple one - we're all used to seeing our big grandiose dreams never see the light of day, but somehow, when one of the daily little things doesn't make it...

Man...

I've watched similar episodes in other people's lives this week. *Grin* I'm far from alone - one would just like to find something happier to notice once in a while.

Well, a new mission this week. I'm going to try to take a picture for the blog again, and although I'm sure I'll focus my thoughts on something...

I'm going to see if I can't find something else.

Playing With The Boys

2009-11-03T18:34:00.000-08:00

I finally broke down and went to see the doctor today. My shoulders have been snapping and cracking in places I didn't think they really should, so I finally went and got myself checked out (Credit to my wife for making the appointment ;) ). He was a very nice young man, my assumption both by his name and appearance was he originated from India. I felt like the examination was thorough, but his diagnosis still tickles me.

*Grin* I'm paraphrasing a bit, but for all intents and purposes, he told me, 'You're just a little guy. People in your line of work are big guys. You need to get big, you know?' In other words, although he gave me some anti-inflammatory pills, he also recommended a regular upper-body workout program.

Man... I was tired this morning. The night shift on the dryer was 14 hours, and I just hadn't gotten the transition to the night shift completed. It was another one of those situations that hurt, but the satisfaction of completing the task was pretty immense.

Today was a good reminder - even I can get told I need to turn my game up a notch.

To quote Colonel Young from SGU: 'A lot of work, that one...'

Killing Time

2009-11-02T08:10:00.000-08:00

With the late/night shift expexting to pick up at work this week, trying to transition from a conventional workday to a... Less conventional one looks like it's going to take it's toll on me. Oddly enough, it's about as difficult to reverse one's sleeping and eating patterns as you might think. I'll get there, though.

I splurged on some things over the weekend - some DVDs, a model, and a book. Simple little things, but I sometimes forget to stop and do something a little frivolous instead of being focused on trying to poke as many $$$ as possible into the savings account. *Grin* Now I know what the wife feels like when she comes home with a treasure from the Antique Mall or the Second Hand store. When I was single I did this sort of thing too often, now that I'm married, I worry about it happening far too much. I will find the happy medium in there somewhere, you know?

I'm more proud of my wife today than I can find words for. As she's starting her first full day of observation at the Middle School, it suddenly feels like she's very close to completing - (a goal is the right word, but it has felt more like a journey) - a step in her education and earning her Master's Degree in education. It's such a wonderful achievement under any circumstances, but I look at how much she's grown throughout these expeeriences and...

I'm just a lucky guy.

I spent a bit of time last night assemling much of my writing into a 'collected works'. It was notably thrown together, and I'm sure the errors will be plentiful, but... I wanted to have it bound and hold it in my hands, you know? Perfection isn't what I was after... I've been playing with it for a long time. I just wanted to see what I had done. I'll look forward to seeing it come from the Print On Demand service, but... Don't tell my wife, or she'll want the copy I ordered for her. *Grin*

Well... Somehow, I need to find a way to get some more shut-eye before work.

Be Well.

"I only hope that in your stumbling around..."

2009-10-31T07:39:00.000-07:00

"You do not wake the dragon" - Londo Mollari, Babylon 5

My professional life comes in definite seasons. Maybe some or all of them aren't what you'd ordinarily look forward to, but they're always looming out there. Tangible to be sure, and unstoppable. Yesterday (and last night) another began, this one referred to as 'Grain Drying'.

Long story short, the crops are coming in horribly wet around here. They must be at approximately 15% moisture for storage, and they're coming across the scale at upwards of 34%. So, the grain must be dried. Like everything else, there is a machine for the job, this a large 'burner' that runs on natural gas, electricity, and tired COOP employees. The technician got the drier moving about 3:30 yesterday afternoon, and we ran out of corn about 1:30a.m. this morning, drying at about 13% of the dryer's discharge capacity (about 400 bushel of corn per hour).

In comparison, we were moving about 4 times faster last year... It's going to be a long season.

From a certain perspective, we didn't HAVE to run so late into the night, but... I guess I've finally learned that work needs to be done when it needs to be done. For example, if I had put it off until this morning, the air temperature today is at least 10 degrees colder and the winds are a good 25 m.p.h. faster. *Grin* I'm a little short on sleep, but last night wasn't so bad after all.

Long night, but... If my crew and I can hang together like this, we'll do fine.

*Taking a photo with a cell phone at night is kind of... Not good. But there's a little to be seen here. The 'bright spot' off to the left is the approximate location of the dryer controls - one might call that 'home port', the blue circles on the right are the burners doing their thing (natural gas at its best).

Sometimes I Just Don't Get It

2009-10-28T18:08:00.000-07:00

Listening to the podcast of 'This American Life' is usually one of the high points of my week, but today it came somewhere between depressing me and just plain pissing me off. Well, more precisely, it isn't the show itself, but the story that was reported.

The first act of the show told the story of 'Hell House', one (I believe Pentecostal) church's Halloween event, designed to (I would assume) raise some money for the church as well as raise awareness of the issues addressed within the exhibition. The idea is along the lines of the 'haunted houses' we're all familiar with, except ghosts, goblins, and 'things that go bump in the night' are replaced with depictions of rape, murder, death of people infected with HIV, and whatever else they can come up with to form some type of morality tale according to church doctrine. Evidently, one of the churches originating the idea even chose to re-enact the Columbine Shooting.

Geez... As if the 'Saw' movies aren't enough. And no, I've never watched the trash - the written synopsis alone of one installment was disturbing enough. A friend of mine that has viewed most of the series tells me 'All of the people involved had done something to deserve the end they met', but...

Come on!

It's no wonder that Happy-Pills are prescribed to so many people any more. With thoughts like these becoming so prevalent in today's society, maybe my wife is the one that sees the world the right way, celebrating the Halloween Holiday with a viewing of 'It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown'.

I just don't understand...

People get sick, die, murdered, molested, and all manner of vile things every day. It's unfortunate, it really is. Why would anyone want to re-enact such a thing? What's worse, one of the churches gave out awards after their 'Hell House' had completed its annual three week run for the best actors involved at an 'Oscar-like' celebration... 'Best rape victim', best terminal HIV victim and the like...

I'm not a moron. I understand the world of 'Make Believe' and all that stuff, perhaps better than you might think. But this???

Call me immoral if you want to, for not being moved by this idea, but you'll have to excuse me... I need to go back to playing 'Buck Rogers' on my Grandpa's grain drill.

I miss the good old days.

Hope...

2009-10-27T15:06:00.000-07:00

I can't argue with Captain Dylan Hunt/Kevin Sorbo when he said, "You can't hate hope." After a drizzly fog lifted this morning, the sun came out, and so did most of our crew, if only for the afternoon to tidy up the yard a bit. A few customers even showed up with grain in tow, happily in the notion they'd be back in the field some time this week. These people are better at simply carrying on with life than anyone I've ever known.

My Dearest Friend back home was keeping the company of a new Grandbaby when I called to check in today, which made me happy because it made her happy. *Geez* Don't tell my wife I said this, but it's amazing how much the joy of a new life can wash down to the rest of us, isn't it?

I couldn't resist today's picture. I've seen some beautiful scenery in my day. This particular piece of it came with the last task of the day, free of charge.

Well, nothing new from a literary standpoint, either. Last night while continuing 'Les Mis' I learned Monseigneur Bienvenu was willing to stand up to a Senator he felt had corrupt ideas, and that he was unafraid of the criminal element in man's heart. I get the point - he's an upstanding and forthright character. Hey, Victor? Can we move it along a little???

Rainy Days and Mondays...

2009-10-26T15:43:00.000-07:00

Farm children are taught to never curse the rain. The reason is of course, once you complain about it, it stops. Generally speaking, agriculture has evolved to the point where it's easier to cope with too much than too little. Unfortunately, Mother Nature has perhaps pushed that generalization to the breaking point this year. I consider myself to be pretty capable at 'making work', but even I'm starting to run short on loose ends to tie up.

My 2IC (2nd in command) and I finished patching up the 8103 Air Spreader this morning. It has been a bit of an extended project, starting last week when a steering tie-rod failed while out on a job and ending two visits from the field repair tech and an emergency trip to Batavia for parts later. Keeping the old girl moving is half of the challenge of fall fertilizer season, I think.

It's hard not to be a bit depressed about the state of things at the moment. Between the issues with the weather, the hard luck our customer base is encountering, and the almost never-ending glitch list our machinery provides... Well, I guess it's best to remember the old saying 'If it was easy, everybody would be doing it.'

On a more personal note, I've learned from my reading of 'Les Mis' that Monseigneur Bienvenu can host ten visitors, or eleven, if he cares to stand. *Grin* Hugo is nothing if not attentive to the details.

As Described

2009-10-25T10:06:00.000-07:00

Shopping for a copy of Victor Hugo's Les Miserables was an experience in and of itself. Abridged, unabriged, large print, small print... Finally, I settled on the 'Penguin Classics' edition, ironically enough, because of the size. If I was to set out on the adventure of following a story through 1,232 pages of small print text first published in 1862, then I wanted to know I had read every word by the time it was over.

The introduction describes Hugo as... Inexact, in the path he takes to telling Valjean's story. That, coupled with a slowly firming understanding of the difference between 'Literary' and 'Popular' fiction prepared me for what I might be getting into. I find myself scantly 10 pages into the story, well versed in the altruistic nature of Monseigneur Bienvenu, but with no idea whatsoever how he fits into the legendary tale of Javert's pursuit of Valjean.

*Grin* It's going to be a long book.

At any rate, my personal literary pursuit has taken an interesting turn. Through a friend, a new acquaintance has appeared that is considering illustrating my collection of fictional Christmas Stories. I find myself curious to see what will appear, but through the connection, a little girl has already sampled one of the stories and found it to her liking.

If that isn't success, I'll find it hard to understand what is.

Out and About

2009-10-24T19:17:00.000-07:00

The Mrs. wanted to go on a bike ride, and reluctantly, I tagged along. Just across the state line we abandoned the Jeep and started pedaling through the proverbial back yard of my workplace along a Conservation District bike trail. I'd seen the area before, but certainly never like this. I always drag my feet at the prospect of going back outside for recreation's sake. *Grin* I always feel like a fool for being such a grump about it when I get back home again, too... Not a bad day at all for the end of October.

Here We Are...

2009-10-24T09:14:00.000-07:00

Several reasons exist for starting this little venture... I thought it would be interesting to log and remember one full year of my work related activities, read another blog that continues to captivate me, thought it would be nice to muse about the book I just started (The venerable 'Les Mis' by Victor Hugo) and a podcast I believe in said budding writers should blog. So...

Hang in there for a bit while I learn my way around this puppy. I hope you'll think about joining me on this little venture. If it's anything like my reality from time to time, I think it will prove to be an interesting time.